Recently I saw an advertisement in a magazine for makeup and the slogan was, “It’s Life-Proof.” In other words, whatever life throws at you, it won’t mess up your makeup. After seeing the ad, it occurred to me that slogan pretty much sums up how we are conditioned practically from birth. We think we are supposed to strive to be life-proof; sort of braced for whatever comes our way, resisting the bad, welcoming the good – preparing for the worst, hoping for the best.
Except that way of living, the way we have been conditioned to live, is based on a misunderstanding. Because we lacked an understanding of how life actually works, we act like there’s a life “out there” happening to us vs. life is happening through us.
We are not separate from life. We are life.
Notice that in every experience of life, you are there. Have you ever had an experience of life and not been there? It cannot happen. You are required for life to be experienced.
We expend so much energy attempting to control life; resisting how life shows up and shoulding our way through each day… That shouldn’t have happened, he shouldn’t be that way, she shouldn’t act like that, I should be more blah, blah blah. Every should you think or speak is evidence for how much resistance you have to life.
When you understand how life really works, you can be in life in a whole new way; free to act or not; to create, respond, to be in life– experiencing the wonder of it all. Unafraid. A wave is not afraid of the ocean; it’s not afraid of anything in it. You are of life – there is nothing to resist or fear.
A long time ago the Earth was flat because people were conditioned from birth that it was that way. The discovery that the Earth was in fact round impacted how life was lived. For many, many years we have lived like stuff happens in life that causes us to feel and think, (i.e. react) and the best we can do is to find ways to cope. Traffic jam leads to frustration; Looming deadline leads to stress, Pay raise or award equals happy. We live this way because we have been conditioned from birth that life is outside in, i.e., life happens, we respond.
Except our conditioning is wrong.
Life is actually inside out. Every experience we have is 100% a result of our thinking in the moment and mistaking our thoughts for reality. When people first hear this they often say, “Oh, so I need to think more positively?” NO!!
Instead, we need to understand the nature of thought. It’s transient, ever-changing and almost, if not always, irrelevant. You are not your thoughts and your thoughts are not reality. Your thoughts are like the goggles you see life through. Believing your thoughts distorts life. When you realize how irrelevant and counterproductive the majority of your thoughts are it’s like taking your goggles off and seeing life clearly for the first time.
You are life and you have thoughts. Nothing to do about that. Thoughts will come and go on their own. There is no need to become or aspire to be “Life-proof,” because life is neutral; it has no inherent meaning. Life just is.
Give yourself some time to ponder this. Nothing to believe or disbelieve. Test it in your own experience. It’s like gravity – it’s just true – whether you believe it or not. When you see this for yourself, it naturally changes how you live. You’ll experience more ease, freedom, clarity and joy effortlessly regardless of the circumstances you are in.
If any of this is intriguing to you or you’d like to dive deeper into this conversation to see how it might help you, please contact me to schedule a complimentary coaching session.